self-indulgent

This Guest Article was written by Achylla Jones (host of the Women in the Arts Podcast)

As an actor experiencing rejection is part of the deal. This practical guide will give you top tips on how to deal with rejection. There are 5 parts to it so make sure you stay connected.

5 Tips On Dealing With Rejection – Part 3

3. Grieve but don’t be self-indulgent.

self-indulgentThat is not to say that rejection is not painful; of course it is. There is always some sadness associated with not getting what you want. And often when it feels like the stakes are so high (‘this could be my big break!’) it’s even harder to deal with disappointment. You are allowed to be sad, but you have to set limits. There is a definite difference between having a mopey evening in when you realize you didn’t get the job after all, and refusing to shower or ever leave your house again while you drown your sorrows in a bottle of cheap rosé and rail on about how you are “absolutely, unequivocally done with acting” to anyone who will listen, every time an audition doesn’t go your way.

That’s an extreme example, but the idea is clear: you have to be able to grieve your losses without crossing the line into a self indulgent soap opera. It’s not only exhausting for the people who have to be around you, it’s also deeply unhealthy. Everyone loves a good cry now and again, but there really are limits. It is possible to cry too much over something.

Keeping things in perspective will help with this. Yes, you wanted it with your whole heart and, yes, it very well might have been a role that changed your life. But you lived 99% of your life without even knowing this role existed. In the grand scheme of things it is very small, and though it is sad, you will move on. You have to, or else you’ll miss out on the next opportunity because you’ll be too busy thinking about the last one.

Read Part 4 here.

Achylla Jones 🙂

Achylla Jones is an actress, writer, and Co-founder of Black Ginger theatre company. She is also one of the hosts of the podcast Women in the Arts


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